Joe, say it ain’t so!
A dirty-faced child’s alleged plaintive plea to Shoeless Joe Jackson was likely not true, but a similar request should be made for meatless Joey Chestnut. Joey Chestnut is a regular at Coney Island’s Fourth of July Hotdog Eating Contest since 2016. Joey Chestnut has changed teams. Joey switches allegiances from Nathan’s hotdogs to meatless ones in a betrayal that rivals Benedict Arnold’s changing coat.
The New York Post reports the sad news.
Major League Eating, which Nathan’s sanctioned to run the event and was the event organizer, complied with Chestnut’s other demands. Even though they didn’t want to mention the hot dog brand, they agreed to allow him to participate in a Labor Day dog eating fest that would be taped for Netflix.
They said that they would not allow Chestnut to pitch for another dog.
Sources claim that Chestnut received $200,000 for his appearance in the Nathan’s contest of last year and was then offered a four-year, $1.2 million contract.
MLE released a statement saying: “We’re devastated to hear that Joey Chestnut chose to represent a competitor brand that sells hot dogs made from plant-based ingredients rather than compete in the Nathan’s Famous Fourth of July 2024 Hot Dog Eating Contest.”
Chestnut stole money from Impossible Foods, a rival hotdog manufacturer. Impossible is a good guess. This company produces a “frank”, but it’s not made from meat. This is a fake plant-based product. It’s like saying you drink almond milk. Chestnut could be a sponsor for tofu eating competitions. Maybe quiche. I’m not a fan of apple pie or hotdogs, but they are American.
Disagree Dan. I don’t care who you are. You gotta eat real hot dogs on 4th of July. If you wanna eat Vegan dogs on the 4th of July move to Russia. https://t.co/PLLbbbvLeb
— Dave Portnoy (@stoolpresidente) June 11, 2024
Professional eating is a stupid concept. I find the idea of stuffing 50+ hotdogs in your mouth disgusting. It’s not a sport. The Fourth of July Hotdog Eating Contest at Coney Island uses a staple American food: hotdogs. Hotdogs are meat or meat byproducts or anything that was once meat.
Excessive eating is not a sport. Chestnut was the main rival of a guy named Kobayashi. He was forced to stop “competitive-eating” after developing arthritis in his jaw.
Kobayashi says that when his stomach expands, it compresses the lungs and makes him short of breath.
Maybe the sponsors of Coney Island’s annual event, now that the MLE’s most famous professional food guzzler has left the organization, should go back to the roots. Remove the “pros”, and draw people out of the crowd. Two corn-fed fatties, and a couple of drunk men who are urged to show off in front of their dates.
I would watch it. I would tune in to see the inevitable crash. Like a NASCAR, I would watch to see the inevitable carnage.
Nathan’s Famous Hotdog Eating Contest is not on my agenda this year.